Postpartum University® Podcast

EP 184 5 Life Changing Habits of a Thriving Mom

• Maranda Bower, Postpartum Nutrition Specialist

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Are you struggling to find balance as a busy mom in today’s hectic world? Here are 5 life changing habits all moms needs to experience peace on the daily. Learn to thrive with these powerful habits from prioritizing restorative sleep to setting healthy boundaries and supporting your nervous system. Learn how these foundational practices can help you reclaim your well-being and bring balance to your busy life.

Check out this episode on the BLOG: https://postpartumu.com/5-life-changing-habits-of-a-thriving-mom-ep-184

Get the book: Reclaiming Postpartum Wellness on Amazon today!

Why Listen?

  • The Critical Role of Sleep & Rest: Understand why prioritizing sleep is crucial for energy and mental clarity, and discover realistic and practical strategies to incorporate more sleep and rest into your busy schedule and daily routine.
  • Setting & Following Through on Boundaries: Explore how establishing clear boundaries can protect your peace and enhance your well-being, allowing you to show up as the best version of yourself for your family.
  • Supporting Your Nervous System: Gain insights into nurturing your nervous system to manage stress and prevent burnout and anxiety with practical tips for finding moments of calm amidst the chaos of motherhood.
  • Integrating Habits into Daily Life: Find out how to weave these habits into your everyday routine, making them a natural part of your life instead of just another task or to do list item. 


What's In It For You?
This episode equips you with practical strategies to enhance your well-being as a mom while managing the demands of family life. By embracing the five essential habits discussed, you’ll boost your mental and emotional health, creating a more harmonious and nurturing environment for both you and your children. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed or simply seeking to thrive in motherhood, this conversation offers real, actionable insights that can transform your daily life and empower you on your parenting journey.

Tune In Now

Don’t miss this essential episode packed with crucial health information and practical advice. Visit www.postpartumu.com for more details and join us next week for more empowering content. If you found today’s episode helpful, please leave a review and share your thoughts. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and refine our content. Thank you for your support!

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Speaker 1:

Depression, anxiety and autoimmune symptoms after birth is not how it's supposed to be. There is a much better way, and I'm here to show you how to do just that. Hey, my friend, I'm Miranda Bauer, a mother to four kids and a biology student turned scientist, obsessed with changing the world through postpartum care. Join us as we talk to mothers and the providers who serve them and getting evidence-based information that actually supports the mind, body and soul in the years after birth. Hey, hey, welcome back to another episode of the Postpartum University Podcast. I'm Miranda Bauer, and today we are diving into a topic that I know is on every mother's mind, especially as we transition into a new season how can we thrive in the midst of this busyness? We all know how chaotic life gets, especially with the holidays approaching, school schedules shifting and the never-ending to-do lists, and it's so easy to get caught up in the daily grind and completely lose sight of ourselves. But here's the thing If we want to show up for our families in the best way possible, we have to start showing up for ourselves first. I was actually just having this conversation with a friend and she was like Miranda I just feel like I'm so busy, but I also say that all the time, like it's never ending, and I think, oh, it's going to be so much lighter when you know school starts and the kids go back to school and everything's so much easier, and she's like and then it's not, it's like super crazy. And then you know springtime comes and the holiday seasons are over and she's like, and then I think, oh, I'm not going to be so busy anymore. And voila, it's the craziness of spring and you've got spring cleaning and all the things to do and you know the kids get out of school and then you have summer, which is just like so busy with activities and chasing kids around, and you know it never seems to end. Like when does it end? And I'm telling you it can end very, very soon and it's a matter of what you put into this, okay, this is why today we are talking about the five habits of a thriving mom, and these habits are not about adding more to your plate. No, no, no. I am not here to tell you to wake up at 5 am and meditate for an hour or become like this productive machine, because that is not thriving. Not in my book.

Speaker 1:

Thriving is about doing what matters to you, okay, so let's get into it. I'm going to give you the five habits right here, right now. So habit number one is consistently taking assessment. Okay, the first habit is always this it means regularly asking yourself how am I feeling? And not like the surface level sense, but like this deep check-in.

Speaker 1:

We often move through our days on complete autopilot and we react to whatever comes our way. But if you are wanting to thrive, if you're wanting to get out of the chaos, you need to be in tune with your energy and emotions. And this does not have to be like some big formal thing. It's as simple as pausing in the middle of the day and asking what really needs to get done right now. What's actually essential? How am I feeling? Is this working for me? What's draining for me? We're all guilty of going through the day where everything feels so urgent and I promise you, trust me, not everything is.

Speaker 1:

Thriving is being in this space of clarity and choosing to focus on what truly matters. It's not about perfection. Thriving isn't about perfection. It's about checking in with yourself constantly and adjusting where you need to go. Every day is an opportunity to realign, and I'm going to tell you a little thing that I do every single day. I love journaling. Not everyone does, but journaling is my thing, it's my go-to. So in the morning I'm journaling when I have a few moments and in the evening I'm doing the exact same thing. And that is my time to like really sit back and reassess.

Speaker 1:

Now, when I had a bunch of toddlers running around, this was clearly not very doable. It didn't happen all the time, but I will tell you, it happened at least once a week where I had time, where I made time, where I said husband, here's the kids where it was absolutely critical for me to take a step back and just reassess what is working here, what is not. And that was my time to like really tune in, to like what is it that I need, but not just myself, like what is it that my family needs, like oh, I noticed, you know, kid A is having more meltdowns and breakdowns, like what's going on that could be causing that? What do I need to do to support them in this right? Or I noticed like there's this shift in attitude. Or kid C is having like problems at school, like what might be going on. Where can I step in, like what's working or what's not working, or how am I handling this situation? And so it allows me to like, readjust and be so much more intentional with my children, with my husband, with my overall family and wellbeing.

Speaker 1:

Like I, I will tell you a quick story. I absolutely love, love, love to read, and I wanted to instill that into my kids, but we were so busy with, like evening activities and all the things and then, by the time bedtime came around, like bedtime with four kids is no joke, right, like there is a lot that's transpiring and I realized that, like my you know, initial idea of like living in this, you know, the perfect motherhood world, what I always imagined motherhood would be would be me reading stories at the end of the day, and then it's lights out and everybody goes to bed. And that is not what happens, right, that's not what happened until I took assessment and said, okay, what is really going on in our bedtime routine? Like this is not working. Like this is not working. You know, having, you know expecting the kids to go get their clothes it needs to be me up here like giving them their clothes and pajamas to get on and like this person is really great at brushing their teeth, but this person not so much. So I'm going to have to give this person a little bit more effort, and maybe it's going to be like this electric toothbrush. That's going to be helpful. You know what I mean? Like there are little things that pop up that we can, we can take assessment on and be like oh, what is it that we need in this moment? And that allowed me to free up our time so that when the night comes and we're all getting ready for bed it's not this chaotic period in time with four kids, like it's not that anymore, and I get to be the mom I envisioned and like read bedtime stories.

Speaker 1:

And that would have never have taken place if I didn't sit back and take assessment and be like okay, what's working here and what's not working here and how can we do this better, how can we do this differently? And I'm going to tell you it's not like I go and I write these things down. I'm like, okay, this is, this is how it's going to be, and then I implement, and then it's like it's all roses and everything works great, and then I don't have to go back to it. No, sometimes it's like a whole trial and error thing where I'm like okay, we're going to try this and it's literally that. It's like a science experiment. We're just trying it out and we're seeing if it works, and if it doesn't, I get to come back to it and say, okay, that didn't work, what's next? What's my, what's my next step? And sometimes it takes a couple of weeks to like find something else that actually works, and then it's like a couple more weeks until you find your rhythm in that. Right, like it's an ongoing process.

Speaker 1:

But I will tell you, my life is so much different now, having taken assessment, than what it was a year ago, and a year ago it was so much different than the previous year. It's like the little things that make a huge difference, just because I'm making a conscious effort to do the best thing for myself and my family, because I'm always taking assessment. Okay, your assessment doesn't need to be like a constant journal or checking in, although I do recommend writing things down. Maybe it's a bullet point checklist, whatever, I don't care. Do what makes you happy. Constantly, check in constantly. I'm telling you we'll game changer.

Speaker 1:

Okay, here's habit number two and this should be absolutely no surprise to you and it is nourishment. Really, and I'm not just talking about eating enough greens. Nourishment goes well beyond the plate. It's about fueling your body, mind and soul. But of course it does start with food. So what we put into our bodies is directly tied to how we feel, our energy levels and how we handle stress. So when we're running around on empty and surviving on caffeine, our body pays that price. So instead of grabbing what's easiest, focus on how you can feed your body the nutrients it craves. And, beyond the food, ask yourself what nourishes my spirit. Is it movement, connection, a quiet moment? Make it a point to nourish every aspect of yourself.

Speaker 1:

I actually give you so many amazing tips and tricks and practical tools in my book Reclaiming Postpartum Wellness. If you have not gotten this book, do so now. You can go to Amazon. Reclaiming Postpartum Wellness by Maria de Bauer, and it is packed with actual practical tools for our busy lives.

Speaker 1:

Like I get it. We are busy. We are chasing toddlers, we are holding babies, we are breastfeeding, while simultaneously making ourselves a sandwich. You know it's so much work that goes into our day and this is like a whole, like yes, I get it hands down a thousand percent and there is a better way. And often it's about taking assessment right If dinner times are not working for you, like okay, how can we make this better, right? Do I need to just like have crock pot meals, with meal planning, you know, at the at the week? I should. I should totally do like a whole episode on how I manage every day, like what my habits are every day and every week. That's another episode on how I manage every day. Like what my habits are every day and every week. That's another episode.

Speaker 1:

But I will tell you, like crockpots or instant pots, or like what little hacks can you add so that you're not spending a whole bunch of time in the kitchen? Like it just is right. And what if you doubled up on that crockpot meal, and now you have? You know what if you doubled up on that crockpot meal and now you have you know an extra thing for meals throughout the week? Or you could freeze it and have another meal, you know, next week or whatever, like I don't care.

Speaker 1:

Figure out what like really really works for you and implement it right. Maybe, instead of coffee in the morning, it's tea or matcha or something along those lines. That is going to like really nourish you as well. It's something else on top of it, and I tell you like I give you so many amazing tips and tricks to really nourish your body and your mind and your soul in that book, reclaiming Postpartum Wellness, and I did that because I'm going to tell you this real quick I feel like there's so many amazing resources out there for us moms and all these things that we could do, but I really wanted to create something that didn't require us to go out to the store and buy this new gadget or buy this supplement, or buy this like stick of nutrients, like that is a total thing right now, and I get it like we live in this fast paced world. But when you start taking assessment and when you start looking at, like, what really fuels me and what really nourishes me, what you'll notice is that those things are no longer necessary because you start building a life that doesn't require it. Okay, and so what I'm giving you and reclaiming postpartum wellness is a whole way of living your life that is going to fuel you in a way that you don't need some gadget or some supplement or something to like be a quick fix for you, because we all know those quick fixes don't work. They're just that they work quickly and then they're done and then you have to keep going and I tell you, it just drains your bank account, it will drain your energy in the longterm. Oh my gosh, and I didn't mention we just released a workbook for reclaiming postpartum wellness. I kid you not, it's totally free. I'm gonna drop that link here for you so you can get that in the show notes. You want that, and yes, it's a total thing. It's almost like 100 pages long. So if you really want to dive in and do the assessment pieces and really look at what's happening in your body and how you can start consciously creating the life that you want as a mom, as a mother, as a wife, as a partner, as a woman, like this is step number one. Hey, I'm going to be a hundred percent straight with you.

Speaker 1:

The postpartum world is changing right now and I know you feel it. It's in the politics, our community spaces. There is an urgent need to implement a different approach to postpartum health. If you're an alternative provider or postpartum advocate, you need to be with us in the Postpartum University Pro Membership, get the method, the tools, the handouts, the advanced trainings and so much more to not only help your clients and your business grow, but to help you grow too. Marketwatch says that the afterbirth services and nutrition and support is set for extraordinary growth by 2030. Don't miss your opportunity to help women and families who desperately need your holistic support. Go to wwwpostpartumucom slash membership. We're accepting registrations right now and we can't wait to see you there.

Speaker 1:

All right, I'm going to move on to step number three. Okay, rest, my friends. The third habit is rest. Let me say it louder for those of you who are scrolling Netflix until midnight sleep matters. We've somehow normalized this idea that moms have to sacrifice sleep to get it all done or to be a good mom. But if you're not prioritizing your sleep, you are robbing yourself of the energy and mental clarity you need to thrive. And I will tell you I know that you're probably not getting the alone time that you need or the time to decompress, but that should be part of your assessment and looking at where can I add this to my life so that I don't feel like I have to sacrifice another aspect of my life, like sleep, in order to get what I need.

Speaker 1:

Sleep is not something you can sacrifice. If you're gonna sacrifice something, sacrifice that monthly club that you go to that you can't stand, or that PTA meeting that you can't stand, or that you know a PTA meeting that you show up for that leaves you absolutely drained, like those are the things that you eliminate from your life so that you have the time and the energy and the clarity in your life that you need not sleep. That's not where we, that's not what we sacrifice. Okay, and let's be honest, like doomsday scrolling or staying up late to binge watch a show isn't the kind of rest that we truly need. And the truth is, our body heals and restores itself during sleep. It's when your brain processes everything and when you finally allow your nervous system to reset. So the goal is to make sleep non-negotiable and if you can't get a full night's rest, find small moments during the day to recharge.

Speaker 1:

It's not about being perfect, okay. It's about being intentional with your rest, and I actually give you a ton of tips on how to create a strategy. If you've got a newborn, if you've got a baby who's consistently waking up at night to nurse or to be fed or to be loved, I'm telling you there is a way that you can get the sleep that you need and meet your baby's needs and your family's needs. Like I get it. Four kids right here. I tell you I have taken all the trainings. I have taken the one-on-one mom course times four and I've got you. I've got you, I know it. So please listen in. This is a huge priority and there is a better way. That doesn't mean that you have to sleep, train your baby. Not saying that in the least bit. I'm telling you meeting your baby's needs, meeting your needs simultaneously.

Speaker 1:

Rest is not a luxury, it's a necessity. Sleep is the foundation of everything else in your life. If you're not prioritizing it, nothing else will feel balanced. Nothing, nothing, okay. Habit number four sticking to boundaries. This is so big and I know this can be a hard one as a mom. Whether it's boundaries with your time, your energy or your relationships, sticking to them is vital. If you say yes to everything and everyone, you'll end up stretched way too thin, and that is not thriving. That's surviving. Okay, we don't want to be in that place. Boundaries are about protecting your peace. They're about understanding your limits and making sure that the people around you respect them. It's okay to say no. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to prioritize yourself. You don't have to be available to everyone all the time, your well-being comes first.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to tell you a quick story, and this happens fairly frequently in my life. I have a friend of mine who is somebody that I'm like just starting to really get to know and she's been in my life for probably a good year now and we've been back and forth. She's also a fellow business owner and I'm going to tell you what happened yesterday. She gave me a call and sometimes, like there's like a quick question or two that usually transpires between us. That was great and I answered the phone and she said Miranda, you have no idea, my life has been absolutely crazy. I'm gonna tell you everything.

Speaker 1:

And she starts going down the list about family drama, she starts telling me about work drama and I was like hold on, wait. Okay, I know this is so important to you and I want to hear your stories, but now is not a good time. Like I have less than five minutes to chat with you right now. What can I do for you in five minutes? And if you need more, let's, let's talk later. Like I want to give you that time, but now is not it. And she was like oh my gosh, totally, thank you so much. Right, and I was able to talk with her in that five minutes and just like, oh my gosh, totally, thank you so much. Right, and I was able to talk with her in that five minutes and, just like you know, let her vent out, just enough to feel better, and then we ended the call and it was great, it was perfect, nobody's feelings were hurt and my boundaries were absolutely protected.

Speaker 1:

I did not have the time and the space to give her that in that moment, even though I wanted to be there for her. I did not have the time and the space to give her that in that moment, even though I wanted to be there for her. I wanted to hear her stories, I wanted to support her in that way. And I tell you, sometimes y'all have friends where you don't want to do that. And if that's the case, if you have people consistently crossing those boundaries and making those calls and saying, no, you need to listen to me or my story, or I'm just going to. You know, word vomit, everything there is about my life, whether you're ready for it or not, that's a boundary. You also need to start putting into place, or maybe even reconsidering, those relationships that you have in your life, and I'm going to tell you also, there's boundaries with our children. This is so fundamentally key.

Speaker 1:

My kids do not come to my bathroom visits because I put a boundary in place that says no, this is not okay. And I'm telling you, if your husband can do it and he can sit in the bathroom for 15, 20 minutes and not get a single child banging on the door, putting their fingers underneath the door, asking questions, you can do the exact same thing and it's just called boundaries and so laying them out with your kids, this is my private time. When I'm in the bathroom, your body does not come into that bathroom and and you do not ask me questions unless something is very, very serious. And then we talk about what does it mean to have something very serious? If you're going to throw up or if you're bleeding, that is serious, like that's it really. And maybe if you're scared but that I don't even like tell my kids that cause, then you know it can lead to something else. Right, you're opening up a Pandora's box on that one, but really those are it. If you're gonna throw up, that's an emergency. And if you're going to, if you're bleeding, then come talk to me. But I'm honestly, I'm not in the bathroom for 15, 20 minutes like my husband. I get my business done quick and then we're done right and there's no need to come knocking on the door, asking me questions, demanding my attention, sitting down, like with me, like. Whatever the case may be, it does not happen.

Speaker 1:

That's my private time. That's a boundary I set in place with my kids. Another is that there's always nap time, aka quiet time, and so middle of the day and this was so necessary for my summertime it's like they're so busy during the day there needs to be a time after lunch where there's nap time or quiet time. And I have kids who sleep still. My five-year-old just like is such a deep sleeper. All of my kids were really deep nappers. I was very, very blessed with that. So we've always had, like this middle of the day quiet time and. But I do have older kids too who really do not want to nap, at least not yet. Maybe when they hit their twenties and thirties again they'll want naps. But you know, during this phase of their life I still implement this quiet time. This is your time to just chill and relax and check in with yourself and read a book or go draw or do a quiet activity and that allows me to have a space in my day of like, rest. That's a boundary that I put in place, and my kids know that it's not just their rest time, it's also my rest time, and so I again, unless it's an emergency, you don't need to be coming to me asking me a bunch of questions, wanting to know X, y, z, all of the things, talking to mommy, this is not your time, it's quiet time and we're all going to respect that because it's a boundary. Boundaries are an act of self respect and when you protect your energy, you protect your ability to show up as the mom you want to be.

Speaker 1:

Okay, here's habit number five. Now the final habit is supporting your nervous system. In my book, reclaiming Postpartum Wellness, I talk about how crucial this is, because motherhood is full on assault of the nervous system. Let me tell you, between the lack of sleep honestly like let's be real the emotional roller coasters that we're not managing just for ourselves, but we're managing for these little people who are learning about what emotions are and what they do in the body and how to regulate it, and the constant demands of everyday life right, how often do you have to get up out of your seat to meet the needs of a tiny human.

Speaker 1:

It is so much your nervous system. It works on over time and if you're not supporting it, you're likely experiencing burnout, anxiety and stress. So how do we support it? It's all about finding moments of calm and practicing deep breathing, grounding yourself, recognizing when you're feeling dysregulated. Little habits like stepping outside for fresh air, practicing mindfulness, doing yoga all of that can make a huge difference. Supporting your nervous system is like a secret weapon of thriving moms and again, I give you so many tips in my book that you can use with your children and help your children regulate their nervous systems too. So everybody has a regulated nervous system and it just feels so good in your home. I tell you it is possible, it happens. I'm not telling you it's gonna be 100% of the time, but what if you were able to do that 50% of the time in your home? What about 80% of your time? Like that's a huge adjustment, okay, huge adjustment. A thriving mom knows that her nervous system is her superpower. So when you care for it, everything else will fall into place. And I'm going to tell you these habits are interwoven into your day.

Speaker 1:

One more thing before we wrap up here. I really want to hone in on this. These habits are not about adding more to your day. Please do not do that. They become part of how you live. It's not just something extra on your to-do list that you get to check off. I mean, if you're down for that like I'm a Virgo, I love checklists I will write something down on my list that I've already done, just so I can check it off. But I'm telling you, it's not an extra thing. It's just about interweaving these things into your life, shedding what no longer matters and just doing what matters here, right now, here and right now. A thriving mom doesn't add habits to her plate. She makes them a part of her everyday flow, so that they become second nature. Okay, so there you have it the five habits of a thriving mom. I know that life gets hectic, especially as we move into busier seasons, but I want you to remember that thriving isn't about doing more. It's about doing what matters most. So take assessment, nourish yourself, prioritize, rest, stick to your boundaries and support your nervous system. These are not just habits, they are the foundation of living well as a mom.

Speaker 1:

Thank you so, so much for joining me today. If this episode resonates with you, I'd love for you to share it and leave a review. And if you haven't grabbed a copy of my book yet Reclaiming Postpartum Wellness you can find it on Amazon and please, please, please, go download the workbook. It is totally free for you and I'm gonna drop that here for you in the show notes and I can't wait to hear you share more on that and I'll see you in the next episode. I am so grateful you turned into the Postpartum University podcast. We've hoped you enjoyed this episode enough to leave us a quick review. And, more importantly, I hope more than ever that you take what you've learned here, applied it to your own life and consider joining us in the postpartum university membership. It's a private space where mothers and providers learn the real truth and the real tools needed to heal in the years postpartum. You can learn more at wwwpostpartumucom. We'll see you next week.